SMITH Haley

General
MENTAL HEALTH
She struggled with mental health issues as a child, developing an eating disorder that required two months in hospital, but says mountain biking - and other activities - helped get her through. "I showed significant perfectionist and anxious tendencies. I was also very fearful of disappointing authority, of failing, and of things that I couldn't name or define at such a young age. Through my pre-teen years, I gradually became more anxious about more and more things. I stopped sleeping, lost over 20 pounds, and developed many physical side effects as my body began to fail. I was at risk of heart failure and was admitted to the hospital with an undetermined release date. Two months later, I was released from hospital. Over the ensuing decade, I learned to practice yoga, meditate, and employ the concept of self-compassion. From the day I left the hospital, biking became a lifeline." (olympic.ca, 28 Jan 2021)

POSTPONEMENT STRUGGLES
She said she struggled during the COVID-19 pandemic, experiencing mental health struggles similar to those she had previously overcome. "I responded [to the pandemic] the way I've been trained to as an athlete - focus on the things I can control, set new goals, and choose an attitude of optimism. Looking back, I can see my error. I closed myself off from feelings entirely. I dove headfirst into training, doing more hours and harder sessions. I began an insidious descent into old habits and thought patterns characteristic of my eating disorder. I developed insomnia, severe food restriction, an anxious tic in my leg, a racing heart at rest, and eventually, a deep sense of apathy towards everything. Through such actions as reaching out to a psychiatrist, opening up to my coach and my husband, scheduling weekly Zoom calls with my family, and reintegrating hobbies into my daily routine, I've slowly climbed back to a place of equilibrium." (olympic.ca, 28 Jan 2021)